AmsterDaym Girl

So I went somewhere and did something. 

Yikes Bikes

I went to Amsterdam. And it was beautiful and strange and surprising. 

Amsterdam Square by day

Unsurprisingly there really are a lot of bikes, more bikes that people it would seem. They are everywhere, at all times. But as much as I mithered, my fellow holiday goers refused to hire them. In fact they refused to do anything cultural. Apart from the Anne Frank Museum that is, which was met with the remark "well that was disappointing".

Instead they preferred to spend the days napping, in preparation for the nights. Oh the night time…

If I'd had it my way we would have spent all night drinking cocktails and chatting to the bartender at Cafe Pollux. But this was not enough for the party animals I had unwittingly come on holiday with.

Cafe Pollux

So after shelling out 16 euros, going through a body scanner and being patted down, we entered the club Escape. Self proclaimed as Amsterdam's number one club, hopefully a fitting start to our trip. 

In usual female fashion we headed straight for the toilet. Well we headed for the nearest bouncer to ask for the toilet. So this lovely chap points us down a set of stairs he's stood in front of. Down we go. 

Now the first thing I notice is that it's not just a toilet down here, it's another bar. With a low sofa and wooden table on top of which is a hookah pipe... people are smoking IN THE CLUB. 

Then I notice that the bathroom is awful nice; little mints, free perfume, hairspray, any girl's dream on a night out. So whilst we primped and powdered, in normal toilet fashion we struck up conversation with the other occupants. Sharing combs, passing hairspray, sharing home addresses, as you do. When the woman (who was Romanian but lived in Liverpool) asks us "Where are your wristbands?"

The conversation followed as such….

"Wristbands?"

"Yes, for the VIP"

"The VIP?"

"These are the VIP toilets"

"Oh, no, well, we just asked the bouncers where the toilets were"

"Oh, well then you must come sit with me! We have a table"

-collectively- "Oh alright then, thanks"

Turns out a table cost 650 euros and came with an unlimited amount of Grey Goose. It also seemed to mean we had the pleasure of being able to take an awkward grainy photo with a famous DJ (I have no idea who he is). 

No idea

Sometimes you just get lucky. 

Now Amsterdam is a beautiful city, but by night it becomes a whole new place. It seems to glow somehow, maybe it's the canals or perhaps the perpetually glowing spliffs, whatever it is, it's magical. 

And as we'd leave the apartment at 10pm and come home at 6am, it meant we saw most of the city by dawn. 

Cool, crisp and empty. 

Which gave us plenty of time to take photos like this.

And try to steal a bike (the closest I got them to riding one)

And then spend the next day sleeping until past midday.

All to do the same the next day. 

Wake up, eat...

AMAZING fondue

Sleep, wake up (again) and then out we went.

The head on that.

But this is where the problem was…I wanted to go to a museum. Any museum, any gallery, any building of culture. Somewhere I wasn't offered mushrooms because my skull was the right shape to take them (true story).

This is how I ended up in the Koninklijk Paleis Amsterdam on my own. 

I have submitted a formal letter saying that if the Dutch Royal family ever grow tired of it, I'll gladly take it off their hands. 

And just as I left Amsterdam, I shall leave you...

…with waffles.